Wait...I've Seen This

This week's movie was a slice of home town Americana that David Lynch titled, Blue Velvet. As far as Lynch's films go, this one probably has the most comprehensive story line, but that really doesn't say a whole helluvalot, because it's just as strange as the others in his closet. While watching it, I had a lot of comparisons with the self-important, surburban boremare(Like a nightmare but way boring dude) American Beauty in that they both take place with seemingly simple people living their lives in Hometown USA, but with SECRETS! In American Beauty, everyone's secret was that they had unique thoughts and feelings and they were not normal, blah-X-a billion but in Blue Velvet, there's all kinds of awesome secrets like murder, kidnapping, betrayal, gay guys, amyl nitrate, the fun never ends. There's even a character who strongly prefers Pabst Blue Ribbon to Heineken. That, I can relate to.

Moving on, the DVD extras are worth the confusion of the film. There is a making-of doc that goes on for an hour and has a lot of screen time with not only David Lynch, who seems like a very friendly guy, but also the main cast. It's very good. There is even a section of it that speaks about the sound effects and music that went into the film, which I really enjoyed. They even included a clip from Siskel and Ebert reviewing it. What's great about the clip is that Ebert goes on a chubby rant about how Lynch abuses his actors and disrespects women, but then Siskel puts the PWND hammer down on Chubby and explains why he is wrong and why the movie is awesome.
If there is one downer to the DVD extras, it is that apparently there was an original 4 hour(!) cut of this movie that got slaughtered down to 2, but all of the cut footage is totally gone. To put a bandage on a ghost, the production team created a deleted scenes montage using only film stills and music. This montage was more confusing than Mulholland Drive, seriously. After watching the film again and all of the DVD goodies, I have a new appreciation for this film and am seriously considering re-watching everything Lynch has done... Even Dune.

Wait, I've Seen This

OK, last week's movies started like this.

This image is from Stanley Kubrick's and what should have been Steven Spielberg's last film, Artificial Intelligence:AI. I actually really like this movie, which is why I own it, but as anyone who's seen it will tell you, it has two endings. Kubricks's ending which is bleak but has closure, and then it goes on for another 20+ minutes with aliens, last wishes, and a boy spending the perfect day with his human mother. Gross... Guess who's ending that was. Aside from all of that, it's a very tragic story, but kind of has a very accurate (in my opinion) point of view of where the world will go if we let technology get ahead of us. It can be best explained in this quote from Jude Law, who by the way has the best fake movie hair ever in this film,

They made us too smart, too quick, and too many. We are suffering for the mistakes they made because when the end comes, all that will be left is us. That's why they hate us, and that is why you must stay here, with me.

There's a bonus DVD that is full of awesome extras, including making of docs that speak a lot about Stanley Kubrick and his vision of the movie. There is also detailed features about the set design, robot design and a look into the sketchbook of the art director for the film. If you like this movie, it's totally worth it.

Next up was...

Batman Begins from 2005. I saw this opening night in theatres, and haven't seen it since, so it was like watching for the first time, and wow! Easily my in my top list of movies of the past ten years (which is coming up soon). Honestly I can't say much about this, because the movie is awesome and because I cheaped out and got the $5 DVD of this at Target so there is no bonus features. Do yourself a favor and watch this movie, or better yet, buy the 2-Disc Deluxe Edition for me and we can watch it together!

There is no Dana.. Only Zool

Much to blab about this week, but in the meantime, here are some flicks from Spring so far.

Spring 2010

Wait, I've Seen This

"Stop being so dramatic!"

This sentence is screamed by Anette Benning in the first five minutes of this movie and boy, was I screaming it back by the last five. This is a DVD I paid for. It was one of the first I purchased when I got a DVD player. I recall seeing this for the first time and thinking how shocking and unconventional it was for a portrayal of suburban life. It's funny how things can turn on you in time. I could barely get through this movie let alone the DVD extras which include a making-of which is a self congratulatory 20 minute ass kissing fest. If that wasn't boring enough, there is also a shot-to-storyboard comparison between the Director, Sam Mendes and his cinematographer. Still into it? It goes on for OVER AN HOUR! The only thing worth mentioning in their discussion is Sam Mendes gets the cinematographer to admit to being a pervert towards his daughter's friends. As for the movie itself, it really is worse than I remember it. Everyone is pissy. Everyone is selfish, and in the end Kevin Spacey gets blasted with a smile on his face. Sorry if I ruined it for you, but I really can't speak about this anymore. Alan Ball, you have won me back with True Blood though.

Wait, I've Seen This

OK, science fiction double feature. The first, as I mentioned last time is the 1988 animated classic,Akira. I feel like a punk though for attempting to write any justice to this DVD. I was really busy while this was playing, which made for an awkward grind because I really just wanted to watch this epic cartoon from front to back and again with the DVD extras. If you haven't seen this film, it comes highly recommended without saying. The extras were actually kind of cool, from what I understood. (Mostly in Japanese with subtitles that I wasn't reading) They had a very detailed making-of doc that was actually created just after the movie finished, which was 1988. Long story short there is a lot to geek out over, this disc was made especially for fans of the movie.



OK, on to the next one, which I already knew was amazing, but had not seen District 9 until now. Racism and xenophobia could not have happened in a better place then South Africa. It felt uncomfortably realistic to see a human society fed up with an alien race because they have been squatting on "our land," for 20 years. It was also really sad to see a somewhat obnoxious bureaucrat/family man go from human to alien both physically and emphatically, to just end up alone in District 9. Sad, no? On another note, the violence and weapons are awesome!! The way people get obliterated by the alien guns reminded me a lot of the gory, splatter deaths people had in 70s and 80s horror movies. Horrific and hilarious! In fact, that's the rating I'll give this one. Also, didn't watch the DVD extras, but the interface is top notch. Like a video game.

Today's lunch time laugh riot is going to be..... American Beauty. yay.

Wait, I've Seen This

In the studio I need noise. The dogs barking will do, because they like to gossip about boys, but also music or television. Daytime TV as we all know, is awful and sometimes I don't want to work while bopping my head, so I have started a new exercise to keep the noise going and test my ever waning attention span. Sounds productive right?!
What I'm doing is, going through our semi-alphabetized DVD collection and watching whatever it is to completion. Extra features and all. OK, so enough babbling. Let's get on with the babbling... about movies!

I will give you this introduction, but if you want more go here.
The film takes place in Detroit, but Kim Basinger is the only character who speaks with a southern accent. Yes, Kim Basinger is in this and she plays the whore, trailer trash mother of Eminem. Sadly the whole movie is pretty much a waste of time, but the scenes with here are really funny.
The movie is mediocre as well as its extras. There is a making of feature that interviews cast and crew, but suspiciously none of the female actors. Brittany Murphy and Kim Basinger are probably the biggest stars of that film, but however not interviewed at all in the short documentary. I guess they couldn't be bothered with this DVD any more than I could. There's also a 20+ minute doc on the making of the battle rap scenes from the movie, which is as exciting as it sounds, but the biggest let down was the music video section. The story occurs in the mid 90s, so the hip hop soundtrack to it is awesome, however.... The titles of these 90s rap gems are shown, but what you get on pressing play is the scene from the movie, when they used that song. OK, I'm over it, I hated it, moving on.



You've seen it. You loved it. You should know that the DVD extras are worth far more than the $5 I paid for this treasure and the $0 I paid for ol' 8Mile. There a tons of deleted scenes, outtakes, bloopers, etc. Also, I'll give you some advice on DVD purchases. Buy anything that Paul Rudd has been in because the deleted scenes and outtakes are always funny. Love Paul Rudd, no-homo.

Tune in again when we, as in myself, talk nerdy and gesture wildly about the animated film, Akira.

Cereal Killer

OK, we got some winners and losers on deck for breakfast. First bowl up is what I called the Dakota Fanning. I tried to cross breed the sweet, mindlessness of a child with


and combined that with the adult sensibilities of


What I got was vaguely sweet, but mostly bland. Just like Dakota Fanning! So I guess I scored on the name, although the mix itself was Cereal Suicide. Oh well, on to the next jam.
This one was shown to me by my lovely assistant and it consisted of

and equal parts of


It tasted better with really cold milk, but this sweet bowl o' fun gets the name, The Donkey Kong. Not exactly sure why, but I pictured Donkey Kong eating, slurping and laughing in this gigantic bowl Sasha had. No, I am not insinuating that my wife looks like an animated gorilla when she eats. When she dines, it's like watching a heart nibble on a hug.

So Bright?

Two more weeks, then I'm dipping out to Chillsville.